So I just got done watching the E! True Hollywood Story on MTV’s the Real World and I’m pretty pissed off. You see, for those of you who know me personally on a social basis, you know I know a lot about pop culture. Well, to be more accurate, I know everything there ever was to know about pop culture and I have an opinion on all of it. I can tell you about every television show and movie ever made and whether or not I’ve even seen them, I’ll probably tell you what I think of them. Also if you know me, you know that since I graduated from college in December of 2002 I’ve yet to find a job. It seems that there isn’t a big market for jackasses who know everything there is to know about TV since that Beat the Geeks show went off the air, but it does seem to be some type of gift God has either blessed or cursed me with. However, it would seem that way until tonight. You see, the E! Channel maintains its “entertainment news” status by making controversial news stories through things like hearsay and allegations said by people of questionable credential. And while those are types of evidence and information, they aren’t good enough to make a show on. So, while they didn’t have actual clips of the Real World to show when they talked about “Outrageous!” moments, they did have this woman who was listed as an “online media critic” sit there and explain everything that’s ever happened on this show. Now, I became interested in this title which was bestowed on this woman and what all it specifically entails. They didn’t mention any types of “online media” she was necessarily criticizing or any “publications” she had written for. No, she just sat there and told us what had happened on each episode because E! is too cheap to get the actual clips. Not only did she repeat what we’ve all seen multiple times due to MTV’s lazy programming schedule of showing every show they have 8 times a day, but she started going off on how hot she thought the British guy who got his tongue bitten off was and other sorts of personal information which I would consider unprofessional for any legit newsperson. However, “online media critic” doesn’t mean jack shit so there is no profession to betray. I came to the conclusion that all she does is criticize the media somewhere on the internet.
So why does this piss me off? Because she’s getting fucking paid to go on TV and say what I’m doing now on this very web page because I’m bored. Tell people what happened on the Real World. Dammit!!! You see, when I tell my friends everything that happened on a good show like the Simpsons, they get tired of me and come up with excuses not to hang out with me. But this be-yoch does it and she’s a fucking legitimate journalist. And she’s getting paid. I’m telling you, this is one of the many injustices of the universe. So if you happen to be one of the brilliant minds who came up with the ideas for “Wild ON!” or “Celebrities; Uncensored!,” or any other show with an exclamation mark in it’s name, sometime soon you’re going to have to do a True Hollywood Story on the history of “Behind the Music,” and let me tell you, I seen the lot of them and I have an opinion on everyone from Quiet Riot to Creed. Especially Creed. Oh, and my e-mail can be found in the upper right hand corner of the page.

CDs I Listened To On the Drive To and Back from Joey and Angie Marchiano’s Wedding –

Rancid-Indestructible; Not getting old yet
Jurassic 5 –Power in Numbers; Great beats, great rhymes
Suicide Machines- A Match and Some Gasoline; The Spirit of ’96 lives on
Sum 41- Does This Look Infected?; Better than it’s given credit for
Coldplay-A Rush of Blood to the Head; Very relaxing while going 90 at night

“Q: Who would win in a fight? You or God?”
Lemmy of Motorhead; “God, because he’s slightly taller”